Check your contracts first
Before you fill a single envelope, read every vendor contract for the words gratuity, service charge and tips. WeddingWire notes that some vendors, caterers and transportation companies in particular, may already include a gratuity in their fee.
Watch the wording. Zola points out that a service charge usually goes to the business rather than the staff, so ask your venue or caterer whether any of it reaches the people serving your guests. If a contract is unclear, email the vendor and ask; a written answer settles it.
Typical amounts, by vendor
Amounts vary by region and by publisher, so the table puts two major wedding guides side by side. Use the range, not a single number.
| Vendor | WeddingWire suggests | Zola suggests |
|---|---|---|
| Wedding planner | Optional: 10% to 20% if they went above and beyond; $50 to $100 per assistant | 1% to 5% of the fee, or $200 flat |
| Officiant | $50 to $100 for a civil officiant; a $100 to $300 donation to a house of worship | $50 to $100; religious officiants usually receive a donation |
| Hair and makeup | 15% to 20% of the fee | 16% to 20% of the service cost |
| Photographer and videographer | $100 to $200 if they work for a larger company; none if they own the business | 1% to 5% of the service, or about $200 per person; $50 to $75 per assistant |
| Band and ceremony musicians | $25 to $50 per player | $25 to $50 per musician, or 1% to 5% of the service |
| DJ | 10% to 15% of the bill | 1% to 5% of the service, or $200 flat |
| Catering | 15% to 20% of the food bill if not included; $20 or more per server | 16% to 20% of the bill if not included; $20 to $50 per server |
| Bartenders | 10% to 15% of the bar tab | $20 to $50 each |
| Delivery and setup crews | $5 to $20 per person | $5 to $20 per person |
| Drivers | 15% to 20% if not included | 15% to 20% if not included |
| Parking or valet | $1 to $2 per car | $1 to $2 per car |
The two guides disagree in places. WeddingWire says florists and cake bakers do not expect tips, while Zola suggests $50 to $100 for a florist, and their DJ figures are far apart. Where they differ, pick an amount you are comfortable with and apply it consistently.
Special cases
- Destination weddings: WeddingWire suggests tipping in the local currency where you can, and checking local customs with your venue coordinator or planner.
- Coat check and restroom attendants: WeddingWire suggests $1 to $2 per guest for each attendant, while Zola gives $1 to $2 per guest for coat check and 50 cents to $1 per guest for restroom attendants.
- The hair and makeup trial: Zola suggests tipping for the trial run as well as the wedding day.
- A friend who officiates: Zola suggests a meaningful gift rather than cash.
- Business owners: WeddingWire expects no tip for a photographer who owns the business, so thank them with a glowing review instead.
Whatever the amount, put a short note in each envelope. A line about the moment they made easier turns a tip into a thank-you.
When to hand tips out
Zola's guide sets out a sensible timing for each vendor, and WeddingWire adds the principle behind it: a tip is given once the service has been performed.
- Hair and makeup: as soon as they finish your look.
- Catering: to the head caterer or captain, before service begins or at the end of the night.
- Bands and DJs: after the performance ends.
- Photographers: after the reception, or when the final photos arrive.
- Planner: at the end of the reception.
- Drivers: when the ride ends.
- Officiant: after the reception, or with the final payment.
Put those timings on the list you hand your helper, with each vendor's name and where they will be at that moment.
How to hand them out without stress
Get cash early. Zola suggests a bank visit about two weeks before the wedding for mostly twenties and fifties, with a few tens. Put each tip in an envelope labeled with the vendor's name and the amount.
Then give the job away. Choose one trusted person, your planner or a calm member of the wedding party, and hand over the envelopes with a written list of who gets what, and when. Your wedding day is not the day to carry cash in your jacket.
Some vendors accept Venmo, PayPal or Zelle, Zola notes, which helps when a crew changes at the last minute. Zola also counts an online review, a referral or a handwritten note as a meaningful thank-you.
Build tips into the budget early
Tips are easy to forget until the last week, when every other cost has already landed. Add a tip line for each vendor when you sign the contract, using the ranges above, and the total will not surprise you.
For vendors who work in teams, ask how many people will be on site. Per-person amounts add up quickly for servers, bartenders and delivery crews, so a head count now saves a scramble for extra envelopes later.